Although I can appreciate a truly good chip as much as the next man, I’m not the biggest fan of fries – especially the fast-food variety.

I can, however, be tempted by “loaded” fries, which are a great way to bury some dodgy spuds under lashings of chilli, much in the way the horrors of cauliflower can be hidden under large dollops of gloopy cheese sauce.

I was surprised to see Macca’s announce the release of loaded fries this week, in “guacamole and salsa” and “bacon & cheese sauce” varieties and wasn’t expecting much, but decided to try the bacon & cheese version.

I was right not to expect much. To start with, the box had been put into the bag on its side which wasn’t a great start, but shouldn’t affect the taste. Unfortunately, they looked and tasted like someone had emptied a salty ash tray on top of some very average fries. Cheese sauce? I’d be amazed if there was more than a teaspoon of it in the box, and there certainly wasn’t enough to determine if it was nice (or cheesy).

There’s no way I’m trying the guacamole & salsa variety. I shudder to think what they look like. Truly awful.